Fresh Produce

All winter I waited for the local produce to come pouring into the grocery store where I work. As the last of the honey crisp apples, squash and potatoes disappeared from the shelves my hopes for the bounty of peaches, strawberries and greens grew as I assumed they themselves were doing in the fields. I also was tending my own crop of summer fun, beach days at favorite haunts, days and days at my trailer, nights on the boardwalk drinking fun drinks.

I waited and waited and sure enough along came the big wet buckets of fiddleheads and giant almost weightless bales of dulse and 50 pound boxes of green and  yellow beans, cabbages and beets. Sadly, most of the strawberries had died in the fields. A fungus and a winter of heavy snow followed by even heavier rainfalls had withered the tender shoots before they could poke their heads through the soil. We had bushels of rhubarb but I had to use strawberry jello in my pies. I also found myself short on friends and way short on fun.

A summer without strawberries is an odd one indeed as this one has so far proven. We have had crazy weather, shit work schedules and the joy of sunshine on work days and hurricanes and locusts on days off (not really locusts but you know..) Uncooperative children and friends who are constantly seeking something better have been the icing on the cake. 

Clearly, a lot about being happy is based on how you perceive the stuff going on around you. When I walk around assuming that everything is conspiring to make me miserable I am usually pretty fucking miserable. It sucks balls and frankly hurts the feelings when you think you have a plan and the person ditches you or wont even try your idea in favor of the same old same old or seem to be doing everything to keep you away from their wonderful new friends. However in the end, not doing what I want because of the choices other people make, hurts no one but me. 

The long and the short of it is that once I stopped being pissed about all the things I have no control over, shit started getting good again. I don't actually need friends with me everywhere, I am a grown ass woman. Once I just went to the beach, bitches be damned, I had a great day and great day after that. I swear the weather has even improved. 

Also, the blueberries arrived. Summer is awesome.