In many cultures supposedly a period of good luck plentiful harvests and what have you is followed by a shorter nasty period where you have to prove you deserve another good harvest or few more sons whatever. Feast or Famine. Its nature. And its predictable. The wheel of fortune slowly rotates sometimes your at the top and sometimes not.
Except in my world the wheel of fortune is about 6 inches in diameter. There is not 3 YEARS of plenty let alone 3 months. Also it's axle is broken and mice get stuck in it and die sometimes and the whole thing jams until ol' Opie pokes em out with a broom handle. Then it goes to fast for a bit and needs to be taken apart and put back together. Stupid old technology and non union labor. I can only afford workers unburdened by excess paperwork.
For example on a Tuesday I find out the Government owes me a thousand dollars. Nice chunk of change, big help with Christmas. Then on Thursday I will get fired. The wheel goes up the wheel goes down.
It never ever ends.
The challenge is not just in coming up with new jobs or playing daily games of find the money to feed the children it is in keeping from giving up and still being able to find joy and laugh at least twice a day.
The saying don't sweat the small stuff is a good saying but I think it devalues the small stuff. If I didn't balls out rejoice when any little thing went my way ($5 still in bank account day before payday WHOO HOOO!) there would be very little rejoicing. On the other hand if I had a bird over every slightly less than good thing I would be a heavily medicated ward of the state by now.
On that note I have to admit that I have been taking heavy doses of Fuckit for years. It makes a big difference. Also, when on Fuckit you have to keep your eyes forward and keep looking beyond the present. If you have a destination, even a vague one, its is so much easier to ignore the stupid crap that slows you down. It is also easier when taking Fuckit to take the time to enjoy the fun stuff that happens on the way. Beware the less potent generic Screwit. That's how people end up on a couch with a can of baccy and bag of cheetos for twenty years.
So my sick time is used up and my daughter insists she is sick and keeps falling asleep and running a fever just to prove her point. The people I know who are not working right now are either sick themselves, home with babies & oddly not willing to bring them over or don't work because they are just not fit for much of anything and I will leave my kid there when you leave yours.
Here is where the Fuckit starts working on my brain and body. Fuckit says you know what? She's sick and too young to be home alone, worst case you get fired. The rules say missing time to care for a dependent can get you employment insurance. So worst worst case you get fired from a job you hate and you can have some support while you find something else. But Christmas is coming. Fuckit says fuck it, the kids will do fine and its not about the presents. Fuck it says your kids will just be happy your home. Fuckit lets you relax and encourages air to enter your lungs. It takes away the myheadisfloatingoffmybody feeling of panic and gives some clarity of thought. Fuckit opens windows when doors close. In extreme cases it is the Fuckit that has people chew off their own limbs to keep on truckin.
But I need two arms! Fuckit says fuck you, you need to get the hell out of here and something to eat wouldn't hurt! nom nom nom....
So here I am, full of Fuckit and ready for anything. Wish me luck.
LUCK!!!!!
ReplyDelete